Every cartoon in the 1980s seemed to have one and only one mission: To sell toys. This was most obvious in the male-targeted action shows, like Masters of the Universe, Transformers, G.I. Joe and so many others. It seemed characters only existed to sell their plastic counterparts. Which is partly why after so many years, I remain perplexed by the inclusion ofsome characters that never saw a figure made to represent them. Characters like:
Fang-Man and Lizard Man from MOTU
These two popped up from time to time on the Filmation show, so where were their toys? Fang-Man had the perfect MOTU figure look and I would have been interested to see how the more-slender-than-a-typical-MOTU-character would have translated into the line.
Everybody from Dungeons & Dragons
The Accountant character would have sold like hotcakes.
Why? Why wasn’t the figure line and the cartoon brought more in line with one another? Why was there not capitalization on this? Okay, so being the early ’80s, maybe having a hero roster that was so heavily populated with female characters might not have the best idea, but I really wanted a Venger figure to team up with Skeletor and Mum-Ra.
The Robeasts from Voltron
All of those beautiful, insanely-designed Robeasts from the Voltron series and they only released two representatives of them, and at standard 3¾” size instead of, you know, Voltron size? Lame. My Voltron had to settle for battling the Rancor from Star Wars.
Sslither and Gagoyle from Inhumanoids
This was a great line, though very short-lived. A big shame the two Inhumanoids from the latter half of the brief cartoon run didn’t make it as action figures.
The Boogeyman and Samhain from Real Ghostbusters
Two tailor-made, spooky-as-hell lead bad guys for the line and nothing is done with them. Shame. Given how out there this line stayed, I have a hard time believing there would be any concern over these two being “too much” for kids.
The Quintessons from Transformers
We're not MODOK! Stop asking us if we're MODOK already, dammit!
Everyone always gripes about how they never made an Arcee figure during the original run, but screw that noise; I wanted Quintesson figures. These creepy buggers were awesome, if admittedly somewhat limited in the realm of what comprises a Transformer figure.
Frogman from Thundercats
A one-episode character, but a neat enough bad guy that a figure would have fit right in next to Ratar-O and Grune the Destroyer.
Action-Bikini Baroness from G.I.Joe
Why? Because, dammit. Just because.